Yes, I’m a Christian. Sunday mornings and evenings I go to church, Wednesday nights I go to bible class, and I participate in every church event. I come from a Christian family. As you can tell by now I was born and raised in the church. Now with that being said does that mean I’m supposed to be perfect? Not make mistakes? Not sin? When I was younger I made so many promises to myself and God. Not to drink, not have sex until I’m married, be more involved in church, only date guys who were Christians, and to be a good faithful Christian woman. You want to know what happened? Life happened.
I can admit I struggle with my faith. I never want to be that Christian who appears “holier than thou”. You know, Christian women who would never sin, never make mistakes, or who wouldn’t do those “awful things” (sex, alcohol, drugs, living in sin, etc.) other Christians are out there doing who stumble along the way in life. I know women like that who appear to be so perfect. They attend every conference, luncheon, fundraiser, they are in the choir, teach Sunday school or bible class. They kind of judge others who are not like them. But I will have to say the one thing I have notice about these “holier than thou” Christian women is there human too. They want to appear like they have it all together and look down on others, but be the first ones pregnant (before getting married), alcoholics, curse like a sailor, sleep around, and so much more. And just in case you’re wondering yes, I know women like this. Am I judging? NO! I don’t have the right to judge anybody! I have sinned bad throughout my life. I have done stuff that I knew better……I knew better as a child of God and I still did it.
I have flaws, struggles, and issues. I would always think I can’t be a mentor or I can’t teach other young girls because I figured I must get my life straight first. Even at church I would see other people standing up during the songs, crying, clapping, or hands in the air shouting “amen” and here I was just sitting there feeling like they are all good Christians and I’m not. That’s what I would tell myself. The reason I told myself that was because of all my sins I had committed. It was hard going to family or talking to church members. There are a lot of “holier than thou” Christians at church and in my family. To them if you make a mistake or sin they make you feel like you committed murder and you’re going straight to hell. That’s almost what I was taught growing up by some family members and even some churches. I am still learning and growing in my faith. I am learning how to love, getting over heartbreak, being grateful, stop complaining, and getting over guilt. I don’t have it all together and I never said I did. What I don’t need is other people (family and church folks) telling me I should know better because I go to church and I’m a child of God, or being shocked at my mistakes. I’M HUMAN!!!!
I enjoy writing my posts to help other girls and women who are also struggling in their faith, been through heartbreak, made mistakes, and other issues life brings them. We struggle because we are waiting for God to strike us dead or pass judgement on us. Being a Christian is more than going to church. Being a Christian is also admitting you are not perfect and have struggles. Stop getting use to saying, “I’m fine”. No, you’re not fine and its okay. It’s okay to not be prefect. Stop trying to prove to people you don’t make mistakes and don’t have issues. So, what if people talk!!!! People are going to talk regardless. I have lots of regrets and sins that I am ashamed of. My experiences are designed to help someone else going down the same path I went down. Are you a church girl/woman? Yes! Will you make mistakes in life? Yes! Will you sin? Yes! Does God still love you? YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!! When it comes to God his love and forgiveness of sin is limitless!!! God loves you even when it’s hard to love yourself. Throughout all your mess God still blesses you. You will never be perfect. Stop letting others opinion bother you and put your faith, trust, and hope in the One who has allowed you to live and see another day……GOD. He knows you’re not perfect and will never judge you!